


Hydrochloric that

by hazelandglasz



Category: Glee
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Different First Meeting, Fluff and Crack, House Cleaning, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-20
Updated: 2015-07-20
Packaged: 2018-04-10 07:17:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 871
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4382396
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hazelandglasz/pseuds/hazelandglasz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Anonymous asked : "Klaine, "for the last time we do not sell hydrochloric acid I’M CALLING THE COPS" AU :))"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hydrochloric that

Kurt is usually a patient person, particularly for human beings that are polite and courteous and willing to pay for whatever they are asking.

Usually.

But he’s going to blow a fuse.

“No.”

The man still has a foot outside, and that is a good thing for Kurt’s well being.

“But–”

“No,” Kurt repeats, cleaning his hands of the dirt he got while working on Carole’s car at his father’s request. “For the last time, we do not sell hydrochloric acid. We do have a limited reserve of sulfuric acid, for the batteries, but that’s it. Now, you’ve already come to this garage to ask that very question at least 4 times this week alone,” Kurt continues, marching towards the man who is looking at him with wide, Bambi eyes–dammit–, “so I won’t repeat myself. Do not come back, or I’m calling the police to go all Patriot Act on your ass.”

The man visibly gulps, blushes and takes a step back. “A-alright. Sorry to have bothered you,” he says quietly, closing the door behind him, and Kurt watches him walking away, shoulders dropped in dejection and typing on a phone with a twist of his mouth.

Kurt sighs. “Hey,” he calls, opening the door. “Why do you need it?”

The man looks at him in disbelief, but a smile slowly spreads on his admittedly gorgeous face.

Kurt is such a sucker for a beautiful smile.

The man trots back to him. “I–I need it to clean my shower.”

Kurt can feel his eyebrows reaching for his hairline. “And that’s all you have thought of to clean your bathroom?”

The blush is back at full force, high on the man’s cheeks. “I’ve tried everything else, but it really is a dump.”

Kurt looks at him, and if he’s completely honest, Mr. Hydrochloric doesn’t exactly look like a potential terrorist or mad scientist.

No, he looks like a dreamboat from the 1950s.

But so did Ted Bundy, so there’s that.

Kurt keeps looking at him, and the man’s blush suddenly intensifies. “I just realized I have not properly introduced myself,” he tells Kurt, and Kurt is torn between being irritated or swept off his feet by the man’s manners, “Blaine Anderson, new tenant in the Sylvester Condo.”

Ah, everything makes sense now. The Sylvester Condo is known around the town for being left to its own device.

Someone said that it’s haunted by a ghost-like doll, but no proof has ever been produced.

“Kurt Hummel, occasional garage employee,” he replies, shaking Blaine’s hand. “And I’m very sorry about the Condo.”

Blaine only laughs, his touch warm and firm around Kurt’s hand before he lets go. “I know that it’s only temporary, until I manage to get my things in order, but I can’t bare the idea of even stepping in that stall,” he says with a shiver.

“That bad?”

“Even worse.”

“Alright, I might have an idea–but it will require me to go to your place.”

Now it’s Blaine’s turn to look suspicious. “You’re not going to attack me and tie me up to a chair, are you?”

Kurt shrugs. “I can only give you my word, but it really is a two men’s job.”

“To tie my up to a chair?!”

Kurt is startled into a laugh. “No, to clean your shower.”

A perfidious little voice in the back of his mind whispers that he definitely wouldn’t mind tying Blaine–but not to a chair and definitely not with someone else.

Blaine grins at him. “Well then, I’ll have to trust my gut, won’t I?”

“Indeed.”

Blaine huffs a breath and then relaxes. “Do tell your miraculous technique.”

—

Kurt’s miraculous technique is to put bleach and baking soda all over the stall and cover it with saran to let the mixture do its magic.

Which gives them a couple of hours of “freedom”, and Kurt decides that since he’s here already, he can help Blaine set up in his apartment.

They empty the few boxes that he has with him–his “essentials”, while the rest of his stuff from his parents’ house wait in a storage unit.

Which prompts Kurt to talk about his latest televisual obsession, and they spend another hour discussing the pros and cons of “Storage Wars” vs. “Project Runway”.

Blaine takes care of removing the plastic and brushing the dried paste, and they work together to wash it off.

Kurt blames Blaine’s gym pants on his decision to start a water fight right there and then, but he’s not disappointed.

His shirt and pants may be soaked beyond salvation, but so is Blaine.

And a soaked Blaine is a glorious sight to behold–and no, Kurt has no qualms about objectifying his new friend, because he’s pretty sure that Blaine is ogling him right back.

“Well, your shower stall looks clean,” Kurt says, brushing his hair away from his face, but he can’t go any further in his commentary because Blaine is brushing his lips against his own.

So, so softly.

And to think, Kurt ponders while he wraps his arms around Blaine’s neck to deepen the kiss, that he almost called the cops on this man.

What a waste it would have been.


End file.
